A bold statement and one I would like to explain more in this blog.
Shame is one of the difficult emotions that we encounter in our lives. It shuts us down and disconnects us from ourselves. It's not easy to live with the idea that we shamed ourselves or others and it gives us a constant feeling of failure or regret. Why? Because our ego's that were created initially to protect us from the pain of this disconnection, take over. Our ego looks for meaning in our daily experiences of shame, and one way to do this is to identify with one of three predefined archetypal roles: the victim, the persecutor or the rescuer.
Victims are those who take no responsibility and put the blame for their life circumstances on everyone and everything else: "It's not my fault"
Persecutors take full responsibility but not in a loving way. : "It's all my fault," and rescuers evade the situation by focusing on helping others with their problems: "I need to focus on this plan to build a school in Africa."
While none of these roles addresses the problem healthfully, they each provide an excuse not to fix what's wrong. They give you a place, a purpose, meaning. But they leave you stuck in the same situation. Stuck with the feeling of shame.
There is absolutely no power to change anything in your life as long as you keep living in one of these situations.
Stepping out of the role of victim, persecutor or rescuer is not only good for your emotional health but also for your physical health. Feeling ashamed of something and not being able to talk about it and release it produces an inflammatory chemical in the body called interleukin-6 (IL6). Cellular inflammation from this and other inflammatory chemicals in the body create all kinds of chronic degenerative diseases like cancer, heart disease, arthritis,...
Releasing shame is the first step into living a healthier life.
If you're not able to do that, you aren't able to accept the fact that you have the power to create a healthier reality.
The ego will take over and will make you fall back into old roles or behavioral patterns. When our ego is in play, it will make you believe that you have no control over your life or situation and there is nothing you can do to change it. This is especially true when it comes to our health, which we've been told we have no control over. This is the ego that's protecting us, but at the same time, that ego is keeping us from living a truly great and healthy life.
To resolve any health issues or negative feelings in your life, you must be willing to look deeply into the behaviors and beliefs that have resulted in your current life situation.
You have to take a broader look on your life like you're flying high above and get an overview of what's going on.
Your power to change is always present! When you understand that you CAN do a lot to change your thoughts, emotions, and behavior and thus change your situation, and even your health, you are empowered.
It's learning that you have the power to give control over your life away to others or your ego or to hold on to it and create your own reality and life.
I used to live in these archetypal roles, and it left me feeling stuck in life. It made me feel helpless, frustrated, alone and not capable of doing what I wanted to do. When I learned that I have the power to take back control and to decide how I would react to people or deal with certain situations that knot that I felt in my stomach area and the worries in my head faded away. It gave me peace of mind, and I felt empowered because now I know I can handle any situation that comes my way.
Of course, I still have days that my ego tries to push me back in one of those roles, but I'm aware of this a lot faster, and so I can take the necessary action accordingly and make sure that I don't end up in that victim, persecutor or rescuer role again.
If you want to learn how to retake control over your ego, please check this link and book your free coaching call with me. We'll talk about where you are at right now and where you would like to go in life and how we can do this. If you have any question, don't hesitate and send me an email through the contact page.
If you think someone else might benefit from this information or might need some guidance, please share this article, my website or social media account.
my name is Inez.
I'm a positive life enjoyer who healed herself from fibromyalgia. I have a couple of food intolerances which help me to live a healthy and natural life.
I became a life coach to help anyone who wants to grow in life on a physical, mental or emotional level.
My specialities are working with chronic pain, emotional well being and healthy digestion.
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